5 questions for finding your direction
"Pay attention to what you pay attention to." - Amy Krouse Rosenthal
This month I am focusing on personal development so I wanted to kick things off with this quote. There are really two sides to it. One, we are what we pay attention to. Your thoughts and beliefs will follow what you think. And two, you can look at what captures and holds your attention to help you find and articulate your why. Distilling your why is a good framework for making future decisions about how you will spend your time and what you will allocate your personal resources to.
Today we are going to talk about your why, or what the Japanese refer to as Ikigai. This is loosely defined as your reason for being. It is important because without this, you may feel like you are wandering around life aimlessly, taking seemingly disconnected actions each day. This can be experienced as feelings such as, "why am I doing this?" or "why do I feel unhappy even though nothing is seemingly all that wrong?"
As kids, we are encouraged to try everything at least once. Whether it's food, sports, a musical instrument, internships, or subjects in school. The goal is to experience as much as you can. And this is a great mindset to have because it instills a sense of curiosity and wonder in the world.
But as we get older and have more experiences behind us, we start to better understand our passions and underlying motivations. And what motivates us is important to examine so that we can get enough wind behind our sails to concentrate and focus on our life's important work. Neuroscientists would argue that this is the role of dopamine in our brains- it's a focusing chemical. It enables us to give our full attention to what we are working on. When we start to make connections and use our creativity, dopamine will spike and reinforce us to continue. It's a feel good drug and it's addictive. With dopamine on board, you can set your mind to big and audacious goals.
So how do we figure out our Ikigai or reason for being? One way is to ask ourselves the following questions:
What are you good at?
What do you love doing?
What can you be paid for?
What does the world need?
When you find yourself lost in thought or unaware of the time, what are you doing?
If we take a look at each of these, you can distill the commonalities in your answers into your why.
In the coming weeks, I will explore ways to incorporate your why into your life. Spend some time this week reflecting on the questions above. Take a look at this worksheet to help you brainstorm.
Have a productive week!
For more great reading on this topic, check out:
The Art of Impossible By: Steven Kotler
Deep Work By: Cal Newport
Start with Why By: Simon Sinek
Tell me what you think below!
I'll be 90 years old in September, and don't remember you from CUMC because I've been in heart failure for five years and on oxygen, which makes going out difficult and attendance noisy. My life was blessed by a husband so wonderful I would have followed him to the moon, by a multitude of children many of them bonus kids that found us. I worked as an editor and my last post was at Stanford University, I love my work. I still live in the house my husband and I built close to the ocean, now cared for by my youngest son and his wife. I am blessed beyond measure. I admire your deep living, and am happy to hear about your disciplines and experiences. You are in my prayers.